Ending relationships – Abraham-Hicks

Question: Why is it so hard to break up with somebody, especially the person who is being left?

Abraham: Why is it hard to end a relationship and why is it especially hard to be the one who is left behind? Well most relationships when they end, the one who is leaving the one who is being left is usually doing quite of bit of justifying why the one who is leaving is leaving.

So the one who is left is being explained to that they are being left because they are inappropriate in this way, inappropriate in this way, and inappropriate in this way. And you just can’t listen to a dialogue that speaks contrary to what your Inner Being knows to be true and feel good at the same time.

Now if two people are having a relationship and they are both forward looking and they are going to the future rather than pushing from the past, it’s conceivable that relationships could evolve and change without anybody getting their feelings hurt.

But most people don’t make a change without pushing against what is. Isn’t that interesting? That would be like driving down the freeway and saying I’m going here because I can’t stand here. Well that isn’t true. Usually when you’re driving, you’re going someplace you’re not usually fleeing from something unless it’s the hurricane in Florida. In other words, you’re going to where you’re going. If you could adopt that with relationships things could feel better.

We would like to say to all of you that we would like you to stop feeling uncomfortable about evolving in your relationships. We would also like you to leave behind the feeling that you have to justify why you’re going. That comes in large part because there are so many people who are aware of you in your relationship who are not in the relationship with you. Who have opinions about you in the relationship. In other words, family & friends are often aware of you in your relationships. And they have developed this picture of you in your relationship which you try to live up to, even though it’s a different picture from a lot of different places.

And so when you decide that you would feel better someplace else, usually you get in this very defensive justifying mode where you have to activate all of the reasons why you don’t want to be here in order to justify going over there. But what happens is all that does is activate all this cross current in you.

You want something different than you have but you activate what you have which just splits your energy and makes you less effective. And then those who watch you can see that your life seems to be disintegrating and then they will announce to you “I don’t think you’re making a good choice because you don’t seem as happy as I’ve seen you before.” And what you want to say is “I’m not happy because I’m trying to please all of you and it isn’t possible. If I could just do what feels best for me to do without having to justify why I’m doing it my energy would be clearer and I would feel a lot better. And my future relationship would come faster, and I would continue to thrive.”

Question: Why does it have the ability to throw your energy off so much, make you lose faith?

Answer: When someone disapproves of you? When someone decides that they want something other than to be in a relationship with you? Why does it make you lose confidence in yourself?

Question: Energetically why does it have the ability to throw your energy off so much?

Answer: Well it wouldn’t if you had learned before that happened how to align with your own source.

See with most people, when someone adores you, in their appreciation of you, they are in alignment with source energy and they are flooding it all over you. And since it is activated in them, they are activating it in you, so you got this really good thing going. But then as you become dependent on their appreciation of you in order to feel that way, when they withdraw their appreciation of you and you haven’t learned to connect to that source energy yourself, you feel like a puppet that someone has let go of the strings.

And so if you’re a confident person, you’ve shown yourself that you’re free no matter what anyone else thinks, that you can feel good no matter what is happening around you. If you’ve been practicing that unconditional love that says I’m gonna feel good because I want to feel good, I’m gonna scramble around and find something by darn that’s gonna make me feel good, even in a field of things that don’t feel so good, I’m gonna find something that makes me feel good because my connection to source matters to me more than all things put together then nothing that anybody else could ever do could set you off your game.

But most people don’t learn that. You’re born into families where parents teach you right away that our happiness matters more than yours. They teach you right away “don’t pay any attention to your guidance, you’re small, you’re stupid, and you don’t know what you’re doing and we’ve been around a long time and we’ve had all the hard knocks and we know where the bumps in the road are, and we’ll guide you. So disregard what you feel and do what we say.” And they say no one said it was gonna be fair. [Abraham did.] And they say no one said it was supposed to be fun. [Abraham did.]

nd no one said that life is just. [Abraham did.] But your parents are interested in converting you or getting you to conform to something they think will feel best to them. And then they hand you off to the school, to the church, to bodies of people who consistently convince you that you need to do what will make them feel better about you and it’s no wonder you lose your own guidance, you see. And since you’ve been looking toward what others think, you’ve been trained to do that for a very long time, that you just transfer that mantle to your newest love. You say I care so much about how you feel about me that I will disregard how I feel. Then that one, being the fickle one that one always is, lets you down every single time.

We do not know of anyone who has the ability to consistently hold you as their object of attention that could even come close to your connection to source energy. They’re gonna let you down every single time, you see.

That’s why in the therapist’s office there’s all this talk about how my mother did this, or my daughter did this, or my father did this. Everybody’s blaming everybody else for their own insecurity.

And we just gotta say that you’re insecure because you didn’t decide to be secure. You’re not strong because you decided somebody else was stronger and made you weak. You don’t feel good because you didn’t insist on feeling good.

And then you didn’t practice it, and then you say : “You hurt my feelings.” And we would get in a place where our feelings would be `unhurtable’. We’d get in a place where we were so capable of connecting to source energy that it wouldn’t matter what somebody else was doing. So if somebody’s not connected to source energy, and so their not holding me as their object of attention which used to feel good and now doesn’t feel so good, we wouldn’t lose our grip, we wouldn’t lose our place because we’re connected to source energy. And then we’d be like the strong one on the trail, who could give them the hand up if they needed it.

Question. So how would you do that because it seems some people are better at some stressful events and other people are better at other stressful events? So it’s not a deeper issue that I might be better at other stressful events in my life and not be able to handle something like this very well? Not get thrown off my energy in this circumstance.

Answer. Well you’re right. If you have not shown yourself that you can line up with what feels good under any condition, then we know when something devastating like that happens, it’s unlikely for you , now in the midst of this, to use this opportunity to line up.

Sometimes people say , “Abraham, I’ve jumped out of an airplane and I’m at 40 thousand feet without a parachute, what should I do?” We say, “Hang on ,it will be over soon.” There’s enough momentum going that sometimes you just have to ride it out. But the resources of who you are, are so powerful that we know that eventually something will happen that will help you reconnect.

And so what we always tell people, who are new to this work, don’t take the issue that is the most difficult and start with that. Start with easier things. Show yourself on subjects that you don’t feel so lost in that you have the ability to feel better. So now what we’re saying to you is don’t try to jump all the way from despair up into the relief of appreciation. That’s too big of a jump on this issue. Just do your best to find something that feels a little better. What might feel better to you might be anger. You might say, hey I put a lot into this relationship and I did my best. And I was honest every step along the way and I don’t deserve this. And even though it doesn’t make the person come back, you do feel better. That’s the answer to your question. You’ve got to find a thought that causes a vibration within you that gives you a feeling of relief which is the releasing of resistance. But most importantly you’ve got to acknowledge, I found this thought deliberately, and I do feel better in finding it. I don’t plan on staying here in my feeling of revenge or hatred, but I gotta tell you it sure feels better than abandonment. It sure feels better than unworthiness. It sure feels better than that powerless feeling that I can’t guide my own life and that something I really really want I have no control about. It sure does feel better.

That’s what someone leaving you in a relationship, that’s the greatest damage that it does. It says to you that you want something that you can’t have. You want something you can’t control. Is there anything that makes you feel more powerless than to want something that another person has a say in, and their not in agreement with you? So what we want you to understand is that they might have a say in whether they stay with you or not, but they don’t have a say in how you feel about it.

You have the ability to work it around in a way that makes you feel better. When you do, what begins to happen is you radiate this sense of who you are which then attracts somebody who appreciates this sense of who you are. So you just beat the drum of it. You say I feel despair, I shouldn’t have been left behind, this is wrong, I don’t know what to do, how will I ever find another who feels as good as this felt, I thought this was the one who was gonna be the one and I put so much of myself into it, now I don’t know what to do. There’s true despair in that and understandable.

And then you say, wait a minute, I deserve better than this. This should not have happened to me. I deserve a different kind of relationship than this. Maybe there’s something a whole lot better than this coming to me. Certainly the person I want to spend the rest of my life with wouldn’t discard all of this so easily. I must have been barking up the wrong tree and just didn’t know it? Maybe I’m pretty glad that this has happened when it did. I’m glad I didn’t get more invested in this. I could’ve invested a lifetime in this before I find out this. At least now, it’s early.

You see what we’re getting at? Just take every jab that you can and you reach as far as you can find for one simple thing. Not to put the person down and not to get the world to agree with you. But to try to find something that gives you some sensation of relief. Before you know it, you can jump from despair into anger, and before you know it you can jump from anger to hopefulnes, and the minute you make that jump, you’ve taken a big enough leap in your vibrational journey that all kinds of things start shifting around. Very often that much shift even causes a rejoining of the relationship that you thought was lost.

In other words, its amazing how many relationships can be repaired from you coming back into alignment with you. Because it was your misalignment with you that caused it to fall apart in the first place. What happens with most people in relationships is two people stand there both wanting to feel good, both holding the other one responsible for the way they feel. And we say that is so dumb. Because they can’t vibrate for you. And it’s giving them all your power. This one blames that one. This one blames that one. And nobody’s happy.

Where if one of you would say I’m no longer going to hold you responsible for the way I feel. Can you imagine how refreshing that would be? To have someone say to you my happiness is my job and I adore you in so many ways but I’m not going to hold you responsible for the way I feel. I’m holding myself responsible for the way I feel. Wouldn’t you like to hear that? From everybody that is up close to you. Wouldn’t that be like fresh air? Well, don’t wait around because they’re not going to do it to you. But you could give it to them. You can get the same fresh air by saying to them I want you to be happy but I’m not gonna let your unhappiness be the basis of my unhappiness because I want to much to be happy.

Abraham-Hicks Tarrytown, NY 10/9/04

Esther and Jerry Hicks, the New York Times best-selling authors of Ask and It Is Given; Money, and the Law of Attraction; The Amazing Power of Deliberate Intent and The Astonishing Power of Emotions, among other works, produce the Leading Edge Abraham-Hicks teachings on the art of allowing our natural Well-being to come forth. ©1997-2009 Abraham-Hicks Publications. More info www.abraham-hicks.com

Loving unconditionally – Abraham-Hicks

At first they will look awful. Try to see them in a less awful light. Then try to see them in a less awful light. Then begin to appreciate some aspect of them. And in time you will discover the deliciousness of being able to love unconditionally. And then you will have come home. But you will not be dead. You will be alive in this physical body, still expanding the universe right here and now. You don’t have to croak to come into alignment with who you are. You can come into alignment with who you are anytime anywhere. It’s just takes some practice. One step at a time… There is GREAT LOVE here for you. And for now, we remain as always, eternally and joyously incomplete.

- Abraham-Hicks -

The Universe says Yes ! – Abraham-Hicks

Not only is the Law of Attraction the most powerful Law in the Universe, but you must understand it before anything else that we offer will be of value. And you must understand it before anything you are living, or anything you observe anyone else living, will make any sense. Everything in your life and the lives of those around you is affected by the Law of Attraction. It is the basis of everything you see manifesting. It is the basis of everything that comes into your experience. An awareness of the Law of Attraction and an understanding of how it works is essential to living life on purpose. In fact, it is essential to living the life of joy that you came forth to live.

The Law of Attraction says: That which is like unto itself, is drawn. When you say, “Birds of a feather flock together,” you are actually talking about the Law of Attraction. You see it evidenced when you wake up feeling unhappy, and then throughout the day things get worse and worse, and at the end of the day you say, “I shouldn’t have gotten out of bed.” You see the Law of Attraction evidenced in your society when you see that the one who speaks most about illness has illness; when you see that the one who speaks most about prosperity has prosperity. The Law of Attraction is evident when you set your radio dial on 630AM and you expect to receive the broadcast from the transmitting tower of 630AM, because you understand that the radio signals between the transmitting tower and your receiver must match.

As you begin to understand—or better stated, as you begin to remember—this powerful Law of Attraction, the evidence of it that surrounds you will be easily apparent, for you will begin to recognize the exact correlation between what you have been thinking about and what is actually coming into your experience. Nothing merely shows up in your experience. You attract it—all of it. No exceptions.

Because the Law of Attraction is responding to the thoughts that you hold at all times, it is accurate to say that you are creating your own reality. Everything that you experience is attracted to you because the Law of Attraction is responding to the thoughts that you are offering. Whether you are remembering something from the past, observing something in your present, or imagining something about your future, the thought that you are focused upon in your powerful now has activated a vibration within you—and the Law of Attraction is responding to it now.

People often explain, in the midst of unwanted things occurring in their experience, that they are certain they did not create such a thing. “I wouldn’t have done this unwanted thing to myself!” they explain. And while we know that you did not deliberately bring this unwanted thing into your experience, we must still explain that only you could have caused it, for no one else has the power to attract what comes to you but you. By focusing upon this unwanted thing, or the essence of it, you have created it by default. Because you did not understand the Laws of the Universe, or the rules of the game, so to speak, you have invited unwanted things into your experience through your attention to them.

To better understand the Law of Attraction, see yourself as a magnet attracting unto you the essence of that which you are thinking and feeling. And so, if you are feeling fat, you cannot attract thin. If you feel poor, you cannot attract prosperity, and so on. It defies Law.

The more you come to understand the power of the Law of Attraction, the more interest you will have in directing your thoughts—for you get what you think about, whether you want it or not. Without exception, that which you give thought to is that which you begin to invite into your experience.

http://spiritlibrary.com/abraham-hicks/the-universe-says-yes

You too can channel Abraham! – Abraham-Hicks

Q: When I was first was introduced to Abraham about a year and a half ago, and I looked at the first few paragraphs of NEW BEGINNINGS, I was impressed. I came into it thinking that… oh, it`s a 50-50 shot that it was real or that it isn`t. After I looked at it for a bit I knew that it was real. And when I heard Esther channeling Abraham the first tape, my mouth went on the floor. I said “My God, this is amazing!”

My question is this and, I must indicate to Abraham: In my most broadest, most wisest self, would I be able to channel Abraham as well, as eloquently, and as beautifully as Esther?

Abraham: (very quickly in reply) Certainly. (matter-of-fact tone)

Q: (whispered in awe) Wow. (laugher now abounding) I appreciate what is happening here. It is awesome. Esther is a magnificent channel, and everyone that I have spoken to that is knowledgeable on this subject is in awe. Certainly I don`t think anyone could do a better job. I appreciate Esther for this ability, and what`s happening here in the world. We are in the presence of someone who is the best possible channel for this loving wonderful energy. It`s a blessing! I express my sincere appreciation for it.

Abraham: She hears you! (covered up by sound of applause)

Every now and again, someone will express their frustration because they too are wanting to do what Esther does. And they hear us say that there is not a physical being on the planet who does not have the ability connect with Core Energy and express Core Energy. So it is having to do with your intent as you stand here in your physical now, it was a while coming forth from Esther. It has to do with intentions sometimes that was set forth before your physical birth, in other words everyone does not come forth with the intention to be an expressor or speaker in this way. The thing that we most want to impart is that: Every physical being is an extension of nonphysical essence, and can have as full a connection with this nonphysical energy as you`ve witnessed with Esther.

All physical beings did not come forth intending to speak in this way.

…you did.

Someone said, Well why does it come so easily to Esther? and we say it is the same, Well Esther is sort of the Michael Jordan` of this world! (laughter) In other words, she was just born with certain innate characteristics that made it comfortable. Now that`s not to say that everyone could not play basketball as well as Michael Jordan but, there are a lot of people that do not want to play basketball. You get the sense of what we are talking about?

Q: I do.

Abraham: …And so, have fun with it! It is the issue of nonphysical intention and it is certainly your physical proclivity, and it is certainly included within the desire within you, and there is not any reason in all the Universe why it cannot be in your experience.

Q: (totally blown away) Thank you very much.

Abraham, Boca Raton, Florida on January 11, 1998

Courtesy of: Nina Ferrell
Law of Attraction Expert, Intuitive Guide

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Abraham-Hicks: Alignment and co-creation – Rebbie Straubing

Abraham tells us that everything contains what is wanted and lack of it.

==>> Everything!

Wait a minute. Even this? (Fill in your most uncomfortable situation.)

==>> Yeah. Even this.

I’m reminded of the feeling of the timing involved in going through a revolving door…with a great big backpack on.

Or jumping into double dutch jump ropes (I really wonder how these sensory memories come up from my childhood when I sit down to write to you in these articles.)

It’s this sense of perfect timing that moves in rhythm with what is already in motion. And we jump in and become one with the wave. That sensation of belonging, of being part of the dynamic creative life force that includes the genius and brilliance of others – that is an enormous joy. I’ve had that feeling of blissful cocreating with others more than a few times in my life and there are very few things that can even come close to that experience of uplift.

And it moves to a rhythm. And when you get in that groove, you slide effortlessly into uplifting relationships with others. And every time the jump rope hits the pavement (hey, I grew up in Queens) or the physical manifestation sounds the rhythm of your cocreation, you feel it through your whole being.

Abraham talks about coming into alignment and then co-creating with others. Let’s look for a minute at the very deliberate order of this.

“It is easier, really, to come into alignment by withdrawing from others.” These Abraham words ring loud and clear to my hermitish personality and lifestyle. And I express this quite literally on a regular basis. The YOFA® system begins with withdrawal (in the yogic sense of pratyahara) for the purpose of alignment.

While practicing the YOFA® inner alignment exercises, you are quite removed from the things in your life that might cause you to tense up, resist, or “paddle upstream.” They might be sitting right beside you (piles of papers, email, grouchy spouse, no spouse, etc), but while you practice your inner alignment, you are so deeply concentrated on your process that those annoyances fade from your awareness.

Unlike mere distractions, these exercises build stability and strength in the energetic field that you call you. This field is really a vortex and the more you do the exercises, the more this sacred vortex develops integrity as an energy structure.

With time and practice, you can allow more life force, more joy, more Divine Love, to flow through you. You become a great big instrument of Light and Love walking around your neighborhood, spinning with others through revolving doors, playing jump rope with your daily challenges, or doing whatever you do however you do it.

After 5, 10, maybe 20 minutes of inner alignment meditation, then what? Time to take your finely tuned energy field out for a spin. Go to the most crowded, busy street in your town or city. Mix it up. Talk to strangers. Pick up litter (that’s one of my favorites). Do whatever you feel inspired to do. Follow your heart and see where it leads you. (Your alignment always leads you to love.)

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http://yogaofalignment.com/2009/05/07/abraham-hicks-alignment-and-co-creation/